Aliens! 3 Miles, Turn Left © 1995 Stephen A. Schrum Comic Monologue Approximate length: 15 minutes Setting: A farmhouse living room, 1995 Cast: 1 M Special requirement: alien (mannequin) dressed in cycling outfit and helmet. Synopsis: A man is sitting at home, watching the Tonight Show. He complains about seeing the same guests all the time. Then he realizes that soon, when his plans work out, he'll be a guest on the talk shows, like-like Oprah! And he imagines being interviewed by Oprah, talking about his life, and marriage and job, all pretty tame-until they came. One night, while driving home from his weekly poker game, he saw lights in the field, and went to investigate. He found aliens, panicked and shot them. Then he realized: he could have them stuffed, and put them and their ship on display, like a roadside museum. He gets all the souvenirs--I Saw the Aliens t-shirts, caps, mugs, keychains, everything. He's ready for the opening this weekend. He will make lots of money, then his wife (who left him in all this craziness) will come back to him. He goes to the kitchen to get another beer before bed. While he is out of the room, strange lights appear, the electricity goes off. When the power returns, he finds the stuffed alien in the living room is gone.
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